When Pastor Rudiger wanted to quit being a pastor, he didn’t know that his wife had prayed and fasted for him for more than two years.
Pastor Rudiger Kurz
Rudiger Kurz is a 58-year-old German pastor who had been ministering for almost a “quarter of a century.”
He admitted that “if not for God would have gotten into the whole thing, I would not be here anymore. I would not be pastoring anymore.”
His testimony of Jesus is about “reviving a pastor’s heart.”
He grew up in a Christian family and his parents really loved the Lord. When he was 17 years old he accepted Jesus in his life.
“At that moment, it was the first time that Jesus kind of looked at me. And I knew I had to answer. I went to the United States as an exchange student. “I stayed at a pastor’s home, and that was when I got the idea of becoming a pastor myself,” he said.
Wanted to Quit Being a Pastor
When the church he was pastoring was doing really well, that was the time the calling felt heavier.
“God has been so faithful. He has always given us new strengths, new visions. And we started completely new, started rebuilding the church. … But I could sense that it was really taking its toll on me. By the year 2013, I would say I was really tired. I was really tired, and I thought about quitting.
“It has never been the question if I love Jesus; it was more like the ministry was taking so much out of me. I was giving it all, but it was like my own strength,” Rudiger said.
He started looking for jobs, but opportunities that came weren’t working out. That’s when he realized that his wife had been fighting for him through fasting and praying.
His Wife Fasted and Prayed
“While I was at that point of giving up, she did something that I will never forget. And she did not tell me. She started praying and fasting. For over two years, I did not know that she was praying for me, fasting for me, and asking God that He would send somebody to revive my ministry. I remember that some of those days I would scold her because she would not eat properly. And she always said, “Well, I’m not hungry; it’s okay. Just let me be.””
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“She never complained; she never told me I had to do better; she just prayed,” Rudiger recalled with tears in his eyes.
He Wanted to Quit Being a Pastor, But Not Anymore
When asked what he’d like to say to pastors who want to quit, Rudiger said:
“Being a pastor is sometimes a lonely thing because people put you up on a pedestal and you cannot really share your heart. So, I was more or less alone.”
“I feel incredibly privileged that Jesus has touched me like this. Very, very deep in my heart, I know that I did not deserve His touch. But He loves us so much. He cares so much. I always thought that I had to be a good pastor in order for God to love me. But because He loved me, I became a halfway decent pastor.
“So, I just wanted to let you know that Jesus loves you. He loves you so much. There’s nothing that we can do to make Him love us more or stop loving us. He loves us not because we are pastors, not because we are ministers.
“I know how it feels. I know the hurt, I know the pain, and I know the humiliation that often goes with it. But for Jesus, it is worth it. He loves us so much. And the only thing that I hope that you have is somebody praying for you. Because Jesus answers prayers. So, if you’re down, search for people who are praying for you,” he concluded.
Header image: Pastor Rudiger Kurz [Delafé Testimonies]. YouTube, 7 May 2023, https://youtu.be/vdmYX37EE4A