A Christian counselor couple believes that the term “being in love” is not actually biblical.
Christian counselor couple
David and Jenna Shaffer founded the Christian Millenial Coaches ministry to help Christian couples navigate their way to a godly marriage. With a testimony of God’s restoration and resurrection of their marriage, the Shaffers offer their experience and wisdom to help maintain God’s design of marriage.
One of the nuggets of wisdom they shared was that “being in love is not a biblical term.”
David said, “God always refers to love as an action and a choice, not a feeling or a state of being.” To which Jenna affirmed, “Love is a verb.”
They then unpacked John 3:16, “For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only begotten Son, that whosoever believes in Him shall not perish but have everlasting life.”
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According to David, God’s love drove Him to move in action by giving His one and only Son. He said, “It was an action that described His love. It was not a feeling or empty words. It was an action that God took.”
So, if love is an action, Jenna believes that love in marriage also involves action.
She said, “You might not always FEEL ‘in love’ with your partner. In fact, I remember telling our therapist that I just don’t feel in love with him [David] anymore. And she reminded me that love is a choice. And I had to wake up every day and choose to love him.”
David encouraged, “If you’re in that season right now where you just don’t feel the love in your marriage, do not be discouraged! Take action!”
“Choose to engage in acts of love every day and watch as the feelings follow,” Jenna concluded.
Header Image: Jenna Shaffer [@christianmillenialtherapist], Instagram, September 25, 2023, https://www.instagram.com/reel/Cxlw0yDOnFx/?igshid=NTc4MTIwNjQ2YQ%3D%3D