Our Adoption Diaries Part 3
(Click HERE for part 1)
(Click HERE for part 2)
In 2012 we adopted 11 year old twin girls from Ethiopia. As soon as they were able to speak in broken English they started talking about growing up in Ethiopia. They were blessed to have been raised by a loving mother for 10 years and only had to live in an orphanage for several months. When sharing with us their experiences living in the orphanage, they told us they snuggled in three-to-a-bed and would cry every night, which would then make the other children start crying too. The staff would come in and tell them that it’s okay and told them to stop crying. The girls told us that after they met us on our first trip they didn’t cry at night anymore and that they would sleep with their photo books we gave them of our family and would pray to God that we would hurry up and come back to get them.
My jaw dropped at hearing them tell us these things. But there is more…
In my previous post (Part 2) I have written about how our 4 year old daughter begged us to, “go get more kids” when she came home from 4 years of orphanage life in India. “They don’t have a mommy and daddy!” she cried.
Well, if you told me that I would have a similar conversation with my 11 year old twins who grew up in rural family setting in Africa and have only lived in an orphanage for several months, I would not have believed you. We brought them home with no English but two months later I found myself laying in one of their beds at night in disbelief of what I was hearing.
It was like déjà vu. Through broken English from one of the twins I heard, “Mommy, me and Jerusalem and Sova… we can share one bed….THEN…three more beds are left! We get more kids…too much beds….too much…house too big…mommy and daddy adopt again….yes, good. Me big, me adopt too!”
Ummm….what do I say to that?
In my head I’m thinking, “Well, honey, the typical US household has 2.5 kids and we are already are at 5. We don’t want to look too weird.”
Once again I found myself praying not only to heal their broken orphan hearts, but to PRESERVE their compassion. There are some things just too precious to try to forget.
Proverbs 4:23 “Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flows the springs of life.”
I am trying to stall my children’s adoption inquiries and rally the troops (church) around me.
People say, “I’d love to adopt, but it’s too expensive.” But those same people don’t think twice about taking out an $18,000 car loan.Yes, I know we need cars. That would rank high on my personal list. But children need families. They should not have to grow up in institutions or worse…on the streets. If you are okay with financing a car…would you ever consider financing an adoption?
Do you know that there are 0% interest adoption loans available?
Have you heard of Employee Adoption Assistance Benefits? Many employers help their employees when they adopt by reimbursing adoption expenses with a cash benefit of several thousand dollars.
There are also countless adoption grants available. We were given a $3,500 adoption grant from Show Hope.
Do you know that you can adopt children with often little to no cost?
Contact your local Department of Children and Families in your state and ask them about their, “foster to adopt program.”
I know several families who have adopted infants, toddlers, and children this. You set up the criteria that you are comfortable with. You are allowed to say yes or no to a particular case. I’ve seen families built this way seamlessly with no costs attached.
To fund our adoptions…
We did not have any money in savings when we adopted.
We had HUGE multiple tag sales, church bake sales, pasta dinner benefit, raffles, coin drives, collected cans and bottles, sold coffee online, sold t-shirts online, others sold arts and crafts for us, and we fundraised with a tax-deductible giving site online.
That may sound overwhelming but when done spread out throughout the entire year it is completely do able.
Miraculously, God did provide for our adoption expenses every time. Waiting on God to provide for us definitely increased our faith like nothing else. And to watch loved ones and strangers alike come along side of us in both encouragement and financial support moved our hearts greatly.
This is how we got started:
We did an internet search on adoption agencies, picked about ten that looked good, and asked them to send up their information packets in the mail. Once the packets pile in you probably can’t turn back. Some come with DVD’s that will make your husband cry and want to sell your wedding rings. We highlighted the programs that interested us, crossed out the agencies that were a bit higher priced, and researched to make sure the agency we were choosing was legitimate.
Then, when you find yourself signing papers, you take a deep breath, PRAY, and grab His hand tight and hold on…
When it’s over and the child whose picture you were staring at on your fridge for a year is wearing that cute outfit that was on the hanger for a year…you wonder how in the world that happened and fathom at the goodness of God.
Matthew 18:5:“Whoever receives one such child in my name receives me,”
What are you waiting for? Here are several sites to help get you started!
http://www.adopt.org/
Every state has their own ‘Department of Children and Families’ site; look up your state’s. This is where you can get information about adopting and foster care information.
http://www.adoptuskids.org/adoption-and-foster-care/how-to-adopt-and-foster/state-information
Connecticut: http://www.ct.gov/dcf/site/default.asp
0% interest loans http://fundyouradoption.tv/interest-free-adoption-loans/
Adoption Grants:
https://showhope.org/our-work/adoption-aid/apply-for-a-grant/
http://giftofadoption.org/who-should-apply/?gclid=CPHn8YHD9dICFRKTfgodiAIHBQ
http://www.helpusadopt.org/apply?gclid=CM7e-5fD9dICFUhffgod5OIIDw
Setting up a tax-deductible donation site for your adoption:
http://www.lifesongfororphans.org/adoption-funding/adoption-grants/
Creative ideas on fundraising:
http://www.amotherslovefundraising.com/
